He ran away from them all

He never played at rugby or played at football

And his brother was a weirdo

He shied away from the ball

He couldn’t tell his kneecaps from his elbows

And he looked like he’d just climbed out of hull

Some boys committed a big crime

While others committed to toe the line

To the world you revealed the freak we knew

Some things in life are taboo

Whatever happened to ted moult’s feather

It found itself part of your tutu

Some boys committed a big crime

While others committed to toe the line

To the world you revealed the freak we knew

Some boys committed a big crime

While others committed to toe the line

You and punter both made the news

Here comes gary looking more like meredith to take them on

In pre skirt days he had another craze

But there weren’t too many that saw his coat done up in those days

Words and music Andy J Gallagher